My Schedule Is a Hot Mess

We've been in a series called Hot Mess, looking at the parts of our lives that can quickly turn into one. So far we've talked about work and family. Today we're tackling the battle to make it all fit - into our calendars and planners, with the limited amount of time we each have. Today's topic: my schedule is a hot mess.

How many of us would say that's true more often than we'd like? You don't have time for everything on the schedule, there's no room to cram in one more thing, and you're writing tomorrow's to-do list while you're still behind on last Tuesday's. We tell ourselves it'll all change once we retire - but ask any retired person how their week looks, and you'll usually find it's just as full. There's always one more thing to do, one more unexpected item to add.

And when our schedules are jam-packed and we can't get to everything, it takes a toll: more anxiety, more stress, feeling overwhelmed and unfulfilled, strained relationships, and less enjoyment of the very life God has given us. A schedule that isn't properly balanced will eventually produce imbalances in your life. So over the next couple of weeks, let's see what Scripture has to say to help us with our hot-mess schedules.

Start here: rest is God's heart for you

Let's begin with something Jesus said:

Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light. - Matthew 11:28-30

A lot of the time, the heavy burdens we carry are of our own making - our own schedules. Not all of it; some is dictated by our jobs, responsibilities, and commitments. But the principle holds: God's will for our lives, generally speaking, is not for us to be crushed under heavy burdens - and that includes being crippled by our calendars.

Stop scheduling for "Super You"

One of the quickest ways a schedule becomes a hot mess is when we don't schedule realistically. I'll confess my own version of this. The Josh I write schedules for - the one my Google Calendar is built around - is "Super Josh." Super Josh never gets distracted, never struggles with a task, never gets interrupted, never hits traffic, and nails everything on the first try. The problem is that the person who actually has to live out the schedule is regular, everyday Josh.

So I over-schedule, and then when things don't go as fast or as smoothly as I planned, the pressure builds. I start getting behind, the tasks pile up, and suddenly every red light is the enemy, every line is the bane of my existence, every small delay feels monumental. But the line at the store isn't anyone's fault. The copier didn't pick today to jam just to spite me. It was my fault for not scheduling realistically in the first place.

We need to be honest about what we can actually accomplish - if anything, underestimate your capacity and overestimate how long things will take. Here's a piece of advice I once heard from a business lecture that I think applies to any kind of life: if you work an eight-hour day, only fill your schedule with about four hours of activities - because every single day, something will come up. A delay, an unexpected call, a fire to put out, someone who needs your help. Those unscheduled hours always get eaten by the things you didn't plan for, which always come.

Life is lived in seasons

If there's too much to do, we have to make choices - because you can't cram everything into one day. Solomon put it this way:

For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. - Ecclesiastes 3:1

Because our time, energy, and capabilities are limited, we can't do it all at once - maybe not even in the same six months. There are seasons. Some seasons are focused on work, some on rest, some on rebuilding, some on serving others. And it's important that our seasons have a definitive end to look forward to.

Think about it like sports. I love hockey, but by the end of a season, nearly every team is dealing with injury after injury. If the season never ended, it would become a game of attrition - bodies and minds wearing out under constant pressure. You can leave it all on the ice for a season, but the season has to end. Some of our schedules are hot messes precisely because our grueling seasons never stop; they just keep going to our detriment, and our bodies, minds, relationships, and spiritual well-being pay the price.

So be careful how you live. Don't live like fools, but like those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity... Don't act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do. - Ephesians 5:15-17

If we understand that life is lived in seasons, we can schedule for the season we're in, look forward to the seasons coming, and make wise decisions instead of thoughtless ones.

Rank your priorities - and schedule accordingly

To take control of our schedules instead of letting them control us, we have to rank our priorities and schedule around them. There's no single verse that lays out the exact order, but Scripture gives us a foundation. When Jesus was asked which commandment was greatest, he said:

You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: Love your neighbor as yourself. - Matthew 22:37-39

So our first priority is always to love God and love people - and often the way we love God is by loving his children. From there, most people order their commitments roughly like this: God first; then our spouse, if we have one; then our children; then extended family - parents, relatives, and the friends who feel like family; then our church family and other believers; and then everyone and everything else.

It's never a perfectly clean list, because the categories overlap. Work might rank low compared to family, but work also feeds the family, so they're intertwined. Choices always have to be made because time is limited.

Commit it all to the Lord

When the hard decisions come - and even when we think we already know the answer - here's the move:

Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust him, and he will help you. - Psalm 37:5

We pray before big decisions and ask God's blessing on important undertakings, especially spiritual ones. I pray before I write a message, before I counsel someone, before I visit someone. But here's a realization I had while writing this: I don't think I've ever prayed while filling out my calendar. I commit the big, spiritual things to God, but not the everyday, mundane stuff - which is about eighty percent of what fills my schedule. We need to commit it all to him, small and big.

One caveat, though: "he will help you" does not mean he'll help you check off every box, keep everything on time, and make all your plans succeed. It just says he will help you. A proverb is a wise saying that's generally true - not a guaranteed result. Look at how these proverbs fit together:

We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps. - Proverbs 16:9

You can make many plans, but the Lord's purpose will prevail. - Proverbs 19:21

I can make plans, but God works within my steps - opening and closing doors, guiding my way, ultimately causing all things to work together for the good of those who love him so that his purpose prevails. And here's the freeing part: even when things don't go according to my plan, as long as they accomplish his purpose, the plan has actually succeeded.

Cut yourself some slack

That's why, when our schedules get blown to pieces, sometimes the healthiest thing we can do is give ourselves a reprieve. I can't tell you how many times someone has asked, "How was your day?" and my answer has been, "Eh - I didn't get half of what I wanted done." That's not even an answer to the question. But because I'm looking at the day through the lens of my unfinished list, I let it take the shine off an otherwise good day.

I'll be honest: this very week, my schedule fell apart. Monday morning I planned to be Super Josh and knock everything out, and instead I got three back-to-back phone calls - all unplanned, all needing immediate attention. Day one was gone, and the rest of the week was hit and miss. At the end, even with a ton of help, I didn't finish everything, and I could have felt like a failure.

But I kept thinking about Proverbs 19:21. And when I looked back, I realized that through those unexpected, unscheduled appointments, I got to see God at work and be a small part of it. I experienced an outpouring of love from people God has blessed me with. The things I had penciled in were simply not as important, fulfilling, or rewarding as the purpose God wanted to accomplish. So the next time I don't finish my list, I hope I'll remember that every day the Lord's purpose prevails is a good day - and most of the things on my schedule can wait.

The life your schedule can't give you

Finishing our to-do lists is not the key to a rich and satisfying life. Jesus is.

My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life. - John 10:10

It was God the Father's plan to send his one and only Son so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life - not to judge the world, but to save it. Our sin separated us from a holy God, but when Jesus died on the cross, he took the sins of the world - past, present, and future - upon himself and paid the price for all of them. Three days later he rose from the grave, conquering death, and now offers both eternal life and abundant life to all who follow him. He wants you to be able to pencil abundant life into your schedule every single day.

If you've never invited Jesus to be the Lord of your life, and you'd like to do that today, you can pray a prayer like this one:

Dear Lord Jesus, I know that I'm a sinner. I know I've done wrong things. Please forgive me of my sins. Right now I ask you to be the Lord of my life. Help me to turn from my sins and follow you. Thank you for dying on the cross for my sins, for rising again on the third day and taking those sins away, for saving me, and for preparing a place for me. In Jesus' name, amen.

If you prayed that prayer, you've made the best decision you'll ever make, and I'd love to celebrate and pray with you and help you find your next steps. Come see me after a service, or email me at josh@seacoastredondo.com.

I've still got more to say about hot-mess schedules, so we'll continue next week. Until then, may God direct your steps and use your plans for his purpose.