Love 'Em All

#39 on our list of Fifty Things comes from Matthew chapter 5 starting in verse 43. It's part of Jesus' Sermon on the Mount where Jesus really established a "new" way forward for His followers and established several of the tenets of what being a Christ follower means. Here we go-

"You have heard the law that says 'Love your neighbor' and hate your enemy. But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For He gives His sunlight to both the evil and the good, and He sends rain on the just and the unjust alike. If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that. But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect."Matthew 5:43-48

So #39 on our list is

LOVE YOUR ENEMIES

This is a tall order, I think. For a lot of reasons, both culturally and personally. Culturally speaking, 'love your enemies' is not what the crowds of people listening to Jesus at the Sermon on the Mount were taught to do growing up. Jesus said it - they were taught to hate their enemies. And aren't we taught that too? Culturally speaking? Any time there has been a major war or conflict - no matter how just - the propaganda machine kicks in and dehumanizes our enemies. Teaches us to hate them. And the unstated goal - or sometimes stated - is to wipe them out. Wipe them from the face of the planet even. To steal a phrase from the first Metallica album "Kill 'Em All." And I know that's dark, but it's the truth. I can take this out of the real world for a second and go back to the philosophies that I learned from Hollywood movies in the 80's growing up. The Rambos, the Commandos, The Death Wishes, - famous line from Commando - Arnold Schwarzenegger single-handedly dismantles an entire private army to rescue his kidnapped daughter and famously declares "I'll kill 'em all." First Blood has John Rambo uttering a similar line.

Culturally - consciously or subconsciously, we have been taught that when we have enemies - our motto, our goal, our objective is to wipe them out until they don't exist. "Kill 'Em All."

And I'd love to tell you that that's just a cold, detached pragmatic solution. Well, if I kill them all, I won't have any enemies left, problem solved. But I think, if we really get down to what's behind that philosophy, we're gonna find that it's not just a sinful form of human pragmatism, but that it is a philosophy fueled by hatred.

Now, most of us, hopefully, we're not going to be embroiled in conflicts like we just talked about. Prayerfully. Hopefully none of us are going to have to single-handedly battle a private terrorist army. But we still have enemies, right?

Some of you are thinking, "we're in church. I'm supposed to love everybody. This seems like a trap question. I'm a Christian, I'm not supposed to have enemies."

Au contraire. Jesus said it plainly - "Love your enemies." He didn't say you wouldn't have enemies. He clearly stated that you probably have enemies.

See, I think the way to think about this is not to say, "I'm a Christian. I'm not supposed to have enemies." But rather to say, "I'm a Christian. I'm not supposed to set out to intentionally MAKE enemies." But even then... there is a good chance that though you do not wish to MAKE enemies, you will gather them naturally at some point in your life. Especially as a Christ follower.

Jesus had enemies. He didn't set out to make them. He came to show God's love to the entire world and to set the captives free. He didn't set himself up against individuals, but He preached against evil and sin and injustice. He stood for the greater good. For the good of ALL God's people. But He got in the way and under the skin of people who valued empire and money and power and self more than Christ-like love and the Kingdom of God. So THEY considered Jesus the enemy. The cross proves that loving people, even unconditionally, doesn't always guarantee they will love you back. Despite Jesus' love, religious hypocrites hated Him. Greedy people hated Him. Some of those who felt convicted and called out hated Him.

If you stand for Christ-like love in this world and against injustice, for the marginalized and against exploitation, there will naturally be those who oppose you, even those who you would not expect it from...false prophets, wolves in sheep's clothing. Like we talked about several weeks ago. Author Victor Hugo gave us this quote in 1845 - "You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life." If you've ever protected someone, told the truth, challenged abuse or even said 'no' - eventually someone had probably decided that you are the villain in their story.

Though we don't like to think of it, and I think the very idea makes us uncomfortable, a good number of us have enemies. So let's define what an enemy is just so we're all on the same page and we have the right mental picture as we're talking. Same frame of reference.

First - here is what an enemy is not. Some people think an enemy is anyone who doesn't do exactly what they want them to do. That is not an enemy. Some people are convinced that an enemy is someone who raises issues that make them uncomfortable or offends them. Someone who challenges their ideas. Again... that is not an enemy.

Sadly some people don't understand that and they go about making enemies. You may find yourself drawn into conflict not of your own making and becoming an adversary unwillingly based on how they treat you.

Alright - what IS an enemy? In the scariest definition - a violent adversary. Hopefully you don't have to deal with that. But in the context of what Jesus seems to be addressing overall in the Sermon on the Mount, and in a modern, more personal day-to-day experience for most of us an enemy is "anyone who intentionally wrongs you, purposefully treats you unkindly, and this is the one that I think encapsulates the idea perfectly - anyone who actively wishes you ill will."

And these are the people that Jesus asks us to love. Jesus never asks us to pretend that our enemies aren't our enemies, that their bad behavior isn't bad, that their ill will isn't wrong. He just asks us to refuse to engage in those kinds of behaviors ourselves. Instead we are to LOVE our enemies.

I'm glad we're doing this on the heels of talking about #38 - RESIST INJUSTICE (CREATIVELY & NON-VIOLENTLY) after talking about turning the other cheek, going the extra mile, giving our coat too... and it's by design that all of these ideas are lumped together in the series. Because it gives us a better perspective on what loving your enemies means and what it doesn't mean, and it gives us some strategies of how to love our enemies, while protecting ourselves, which is perfectly valid. We established that last week - Jesus is not asking us to be victims or doormats. We are not called to succumb to evil. To lose to evil. To be hurt by those who wish to hurt us. We're called to resist evil and injustice creatively and non-violently WHILE loving our enemies. So let's just clear this up right now -

Love is not approval of bad behavior. Not at all. Love does not equal agreement. Love is not rolling over and letting evil intention or bad behavior win. Listen, in some cases, love can be an attempt to understand the other person's position. In most cases, I think love involves an attempt to empathize in some capacity and we'll talk about that more later. But Jesus called us to love our enemies. Not to capitulate to them or acquiesce to them.

Here's another truth to keep in mind. Love does not equal trust. Remember

#16 - "BE SHREWD AS SNAKES"

Yeah. Jesus wasn't naive. We shouldn't be either. You can love someone and still not loan them your car. You feel me?

Alright - here's something else that love is not - love is not pretending nothing happened. Love does require us to forgive our enemies - and that's gonna be something we talk about in the near future - but forgiveness does not mean that there are no consequences and there are no boundaries for safety. You can forgive someone without letting them off the hook for consequences that they have created. See you may have hurt me. And I can love you. But I don't have to give you my Netflix password again.

Here's something else that love is not. Love is not reconciliation. Not always. To quote another Metallica work - "Sad But True." You can love someone and because of what they've done to you or those who you love, because of the danger they still pose, or because proximity to you, access to you, their presence disturbs your mental, physical, spiritual, emotional, or psychological well being, you can love them from a distance. And you may have to. Some situations demand it. You can set boundaries and still show love. You can wish people well and pray for them from a distance while protecting your own well being. As is the case with me and Chomper... a neighborhood dog.

Listen, I love dogs. I do. I love animals period. But I love dogs. All dogs. Small dogs. Big dogs. Medium dogs. Smart dogs. Dumb dogs. Pretty dogs. Ugly dogs. Old dogs. Young dogs. Doesn't matter the breed, I love dogs. Well, when I go on walks around my neighborhood, with or without my own dog, there is a neighbor's dog right at the edge of the cul-de-sac. I call him "Chomper." I don't know his real name because we've never had a civil conversation. Not once. Every time I go on a walk, this dog hits his fence and barks at me aggressively - as in like 1980's Wrestling Promo Aggressively. Like he wants to tear my arm off and use it like a rawhide chew. Now it does not matter what I do. How nice I talk to him. He sees me regularly. Still the same thing - "I'm not a threat, what's your problem?" Doesn't matter. I can cross to the other side of the street. Give him a wide berth. Guess what. It's not wide enough for Chomper. Still goes nuts barking at me. But I'm trying. Cause I realize that my presence elicits a response from him that's not the best. And as much as him getting all riled up isn't pleasant for me, I imagine it's not pleasant for the dog either.

Here's what I know about Chomper. I recognize that that dog does not love me. And he is dangerous. He is hazardous to MY health and well being. If I get too close, he will bite me. Repeatedly. He will cause me injury. I don't hate Chomper. I love all dogs. Or at least I want to. But I have to love Chomper from a distance.

I mean Chomper no harm. I don't hate the dog. I just understand that the dog doesn't understand ME. And the dog is incapable of respecting healthy boundaries and if that cinder block wall and chain link fence weren't there, I would be kibbles and bits.

But you know what? If I saw that Chomper got out, even though that dog doesn't love me - I would call its owner, I would call animal control. I would do my darnedest to make sure he doesn't get injured and he makes it home safe. I realize, if I go up to him with a leash and say "here boy" - I won't be just calling the owners or animal control, I'll be calling an ambulance for me. So I can't do that. I have to love him from a distance. If for some reason the owners got sick or were waylaid on a trip and the dog was crying for food or water, I realize I can't hop the fence and open up a bag of The Farmer's Dog for him. But I would do my best to figure out a way to get him food and water... maybe a drone or a rope and a bucket. I'd pray for him too.

We all have "Chompers" in our lives, don't we? Chomper does not love me. He thinks I'm the enemy. But I can still love Chomper. From a distance and protect myself. And I think that's still very much a Christ-like love.

You know, the Greeks had a lot of different words for love. Different words meant different things. In English, we just have "love" and it kind of spans a very broad definition. We can say, "I love dogs. I love tacos. I love my wife." Those are not the same kinds of love. At least I hope not. I mean, you do you... but the Greeks had different words for the kinds of love they were describing. Eros was romantic love. Phileo was brotherly love. Well the word that is used that we translate in this passage where Jesus says "love your enemies" is the word Agape. Actually it's a conjugation of the root Agape. <<agapate>> - Now this love - this Agape love - it is a love that is PACKED with defining characteristics. And if we don't get all of them, we might get the way we love our enemies wrong.

First - Agape love, you may have heard, is unconditional love. This is true. In Greek culture, and in the early Christian church, Agape love was considered the HIGHEST form of love. It is unconditional, selfless, AND sacrificial. And if we AGAPE our enemies - if we LOVE our enemies in this manner - it has to be this kind of love. "Hey, they were jerks to me. They tried to harm me." Yep. And under most conditions, that would be a clear "Nope. Not gonna love this person. They have not earned it. In fact they have earned my wrath." Not so for followers of Christ. We're gonna love 'em anyways... Selfless... I don't know how you love your enemies unless you take your self out of it. If I just love based on my own feelings, on my own human nature, yeah my enemies aren't being loved. But if I take my self out of the equation and I put Jesus into it... and I'm called to demonstrate the love of Christ... a form of AGAPE love... then it's gotta be selfless. And sacrificial - okay, once again, that does not mean sacrifice to the point of harming yourself. That does not mean putting yourself in harm's way. You were called to AGAPE, you were not called to put yourself on a cross. That was Jesus' mission, not yours. But to sacrifice... AGAPE love does sacrifice... it lays down our right to seek revenge. It lays down our right to be bitter or withhold blessings. It lays out our human hatred and kills it right there on the altar of AGAPE love.

Agape love was considered the highest form of love or CHARITY. It is a sacrificial love that transcends situations and relationships and exists regardless of the circumstances.

Agape love is also defined as "to love, to wish well to. It is a conscious dedication to the well-being of others without expecting anything in return." "To manifest generous concern for."

So to LOVE our enemies as Jesus asks us to do... is to wish well to our enemies. To work for the well being of our enemies.

I'm gonna give you one more part of the definition of AGAPE and this might be where the answer to the question "How do I love someone, I don't even like" lies.

Agape love is not driven by emotion, but by ACTION and deliberate choice.

When Jesus says "love your enemies" - that love that we are to show - it doesn't come from our feelings. Because we will probably never FEEL like loving a person who hurt us or who seeks ill will against us. It's not based on feelings or emotions -

Love is a choice.

And

Love is an action.

Put it together, and love is a choice to act in someone's best interests... whether they 'deserve' it or not. Whether we like them or not. And in the case of the Chompers in our lives... whether they like US or not.

Right? The question isn't just "How do we love people we don't even like." It's also "How do we love people that don't like us?" Enemies.

The answer is to CHOOSE not to respond in kind. Not to fight fire with fire. Your enemy can choose to have ill will toward you. You can CHOOSE not to have MUTUAL ill will. That doesn't mean you're not going to FEEL some kind of way about how they're treating you. That's natural. You're not an unfeeling robot. But instead of responding with ill will toward them, we CHOOSE to wish well to our enemies. And when given the opportunity to ACT in our enemies' best interests without opening ourselves up to further harm, we CHOOSE to ACT for their well being without expecting anything in return.

The apostle Paul sums it up like this in Romans 12:19-21-

"Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the scriptures say, 'I will take revenge; I will pay them back,' says the Lord. Instead, 'If your enemies are hungry, feed them. If they are thirsty, give them something to drink. In doing this you will heap burning coals of shame on their heads.' Don't let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good." Romans 12:19-21

In other words... we choose to kill 'em with kindness.

Love your enemies... Kill 'em all.

Next week we'll talk about some practical ways to do this, even though it is exceedingly hard. We'll look at some more scriptures for some helpful advice on how to love our enemies. And we'll talk about the POSITIVE effects that loving your enemies has not just on them - but on YOU and your health as well.

Until next time, may the God who loves us all unconditionally teach us to love beyond fear, beyond anger and beyond revenge. Go in peace... and love 'em all. God bless you, have a great week!